Log in

No account? Create an account


There's beauty in the broken.

Monday, 06 Sep 2010 | 12:36AM

Yesterday I had a profound experience.

During service, the preacher talked and I listened, yet all the while I felt like something was about to happen for me... as if I was on the cusp of a great discovery.

Then she told us to close our eyes and started saying/praying something. That's when all heaven seemed to burst forth and God spoke to me loud and clear.
I sobbed, then it progressed to a wail... and all the while, God was speaking to me about where He is calling me to go and about a country I have a burden for. Best thing is, I know nuts about this country and even now, I've got no idea about what to do or how to do it... :)

God spoke to me. Then I had to struggle and count the cost. It was very tough knowing the things that following Jesus will eventually cost. But by the grace of God, I said "yes" to Him. And then God told me that I had chosen the better/greater thing. Wow. A wave of peace just washed over and through me.

So I took a physical step to solidify my commitment. Up at the front, I told God that I want all that He has for me. Then, it hit - how can a person like me, with all the stuff and sin and imperfection that I have, be worthy of such a high calling? Can't be me, Lord. You made a mistake, I told Him. And God calmly and plainly told me that He chose me and still chooses to use me. It is through the downtrodden and poor in spirit and imperfect, broken ones that God's glory is most greatly shown.

Cannot believe He chooses me - with all my baggage, all my shortcomings... Yet He still chooses so.

This is the second time I remember God ever speaking so loudly and clearly to me in church. I can't deny it; He did speak and even though I don't always see 'proof' in the natural, I trust what He says and I trust His nature.

I cannot do anything apart from Him. And why so? To remind myself that I am but a treasure in a jar of clay... To remind myself that I cannot not depend on Him. That I live on every word that comes from His mouth. That ultimately, if there is to be any goal in life, it is to know Him and make Him known.

Praise You Father, that I am but a small human being and yet you still choose me to make You known.

I give you all my ashes and exchange it for beauty.

Link | Ladeedummm {6} |


Have run out of interesting titles. Sorry.

Wednesday, 21 Jul 2010 | 11:18PM
Location: 1.356151, 103.752998

HO...... This lady needs to get a grip on herself.

Link | Ladeedummm {2} |



Tuesday, 13 Jul 2010 | 10:56PM
Location: 1.3532,103.7547

I don't follow trends. In fact, I like to oppose them.


Does that make me a rebel?


So I think everyone has a song for the songwriting class, except me. By song I mean one with proper lyrics, a melody and some sort of recording. Well, I've always wanted to try it but somehow never got down to it! All I have are recordings of me doing prophetic songs (which I won't let anyone listen to, haha, unless I change my mind).

Soooo, I am just going to suck up the teaching and let it brew and brew. I know at the right time some rhema word / prophetic word will come and God will inspire me to write. Till then, this mind is brewing non-stop, but may a song arise from His heart through me, not solely my mind. :)

It will come, I'm so confident of that :)

Link | Ladeedummm {6} |


Through a looking glass

Sunday, 11 Jul 2010 | 02:58PM
Location: 1.3543,103.7592

I used to think it was real
I thought it beautiful
Stuff made of dreams

But now I see
I'd been looking
Only through my tiny own perspective

Stepping back,
I see
Who I was meant to be
How in His great plans
He allowed me to see
A small part of this mystery

Then it was revealed to me
All I'd known wasn't meant to be
It was part of how everything would come to be
Yet the road had to be taken
The joy and pain reveled in

To know that He made you for me
Is as wonderful as can be
You're a part of the great big mystery
Of how love comes to be
Now everlasting
Now beautiful

Link | Ladeedummm |


Ooh la la

Sunday, 20 Jun 2010 | 11:04PM
Location: 1.3535,103.7545

Life is good... :D

I've never enjoyed life more than now, at 21. Loving everything I'm doing, the people I know, etc.

Nothing much has changed in real life.

It's just my perspective that's changed.

Well, the switch finally got turned on and I now see the light ;)


Link | Ladeedummm {6} |